Taxiing in the "Not Yet" Zone

One word that has really resonated with my current season is this idea of taxiing on a plane.

When I moved out to Long Beach 7 months ago, I had high hopes for how it all would unfold. I assumed that I would have a few more things figured out by now. But the reality is, I am still very much in the thick of my transition. God has provided abundant, temporary provisions for me. Yet, I still have huge questions looming as I look towards the future.

I feel like I have landed. I'm here in Long Beach. A place I have come to love and call home. I can see out my window and see all that I came here for. I am experiencing tastes of what doing ministry in the city looks like. I am waiting, watching, legs cramped, exhausted, anticipating. So close. Yet, not quite there. Got my bags, ready to go. Yet, I am at the mercy of the pilot and his cue to empty the plane.

I feel so ready to jump out and start putting some of these deep, inward convictions into practice. To love and work towards the shalom of the city. I'm ready to be immersed. To be radically changed. For my heart's capacity to love to be stretched. To be surprised by God's work all around me. To join Him in it.

Yet, the practicality of finding a full-time job has put my life at a standstill. I find myself at the end of 2011 with a status update of "not yet."

To take this analogy another step forward, I feel like I have been privileged to fly first class in this temporary transition. God has blessed me with abundant provisions--an incredible home and people who have taken me in as family, beautiful children which give me so much joy and life, two incredible jobs that allow me to work with some incredible people, friendships that will last a lifetime, and opportunities to serve in the church and community.

However, planes were built to fly you from one destination to another. We're not meant to settle on the plane. We're meant to land and get off. And such is the nature of my transition. I was never meant to settle here. Which, at times, can make the in between a hard place to be.

If I allow myself to zoom out at the bigger picture, I realize that my view of what's ahead might be a little short-sighted:

Words from a wise man, "Consider the ‘long-view’. 'Don’t try to transform your neighborhood or city this year. Give it time. If you stay in a place for 30 years, you’ll be surprised what God does.' Buy a house. Have children. Develop friendships. Consider the Jeremiah strategy, not just Jonah’s'."

This wisdom is just a reminder to me that God's plans or timeline is not my own. He sees the bigger picture, where my human mind can only conceive what's in front of me. Most times, out of good intentions, I am so eager to move. But in my eagerness, I can also move ahead of God. The "not yet's" are just as important as the "yes's" from God. And endurance is what is needed in order to encounter long-term change.


So as I look towards 2012, I am both hopeful and learning to trust that the plan that God has laid out is what's best. That is why I'm here. Not for my own agenda. So I must be patient, ask God to strengthen my waiting muscles, and  help me be faithful in the "not yet" moments of my life.


Let me take my cues from Jeremiah and learn what it means to endure with hope.

"Not only that, but we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, 
and endurance produces character, and character produces hope,  
and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts 
through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us" (Romans 5:3-5).